Hope helps depression


I am somewhat amazed that people still believe depression is something we can just “get over.”  Depression is a real, treatable illness that often requires medical attention.

Outside of traditional medicine I have discovered when I could find even a glimmer of hope I could survive for just one more day.  For someone who does not live with bipolar depression or depression it may be hard to understand I am not being dramatic when I talk like this.

As I was thinking about the title for this blog it took me back to a time several years ago when I was experiencing  months of relentless depression and daily battles with suicidal thoughts. I was already very down when my dog of 18 years died.  The grief on top of my long battle with depression made me numb with emotions.

Just when I started to have a breakthrough my other dog died and it set me back into intense emotional pain.  Sometimes when I look back at where I have traveled from it is easy to see why my struggles were so long and challenging.

I have a memory of one day in particular when I was crying in my bed.  My eyes were swollen with tears, my head ached from crying so long and the suicidal thoughts repeated over and over.  I squeezed my eyes closed and opened just a crack.  I saw light shining through the blinds.  It was not a lot but it was a sign I was looking for.  My sliver of light was the hope that things were going to get better and one day I was going to recover.

I have battled depression for years.  I know that finding hope in a seemingly hopeless state of mind is very difficult.  But I also know that surviving depression boils down to toiling one day at a time.

Each and everyday I find myself depressed I search for something that makes me feel hopeful.  I picture the smiles on loved ones faces.  I find hope and inspiration in the little things in life like my cat rolling over on my feet.

And my solid rock is my faith.  When there is no rainbow I know I am watched over even in the midst of the darkest storm.  In this I find gives me hope and a will to survive even the toughest times.

Hope long enough until you can believe that things will get better.

Advertisements

9 thoughts on “Hope helps depression

  1. The hopelessness is the worst part of my depression. I could live with it if I had hope, but when it’s at its worst, when there is absolutely no hope before me, I am most afraid. Afraid of life. Afraid of ending life. Afraid of the the depression. Yeah, the hopelessness is the worst!

    Like

    1. Dear Paul…I feel for you. Depression is a very thought illness. You are so right without hope everything is something to fear. I learned one time from a therapist that “depression tells you lies and don’t believe it.” It was her way of encouraging me to fight suicidal thoughts. I have used that comment many times. Hang in there….

      Like

  2. Hi Amy.

    As a fellow sufferer of depression, bipolar and BPD, I agree with you. We have to take one day, one minute at a time. It’s the little things that lift us not huge happenings.
    I find that when I have to face change, I get very distressed and the thoughts of what if, make me depressed. However, I learnt to overcome and realise that ‘what if’ doesn’t exist, so I live moment to moment and it helps so much.

    Great Blog!
    Love
    Deborah

    Like

    1. Hi Deborah…you are so right sometimes it comes down to moment to moment. I really try hard not to let my thinking go down that pathway of “what ifs.” It is hard sometimes but I find it helps me stay balanced when I stay in the present. Thanks for commenting and keep up the good fight!! Amy

      Liked by 1 person

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s